🧛🏻♀️
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My toxic trait is thinking “I could just make that instead of buying it” and then never doing either
(via dipsybelle)
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Fell down a rabbit hole reading about Chandelier by Sia, and…well…this:
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saw this massive onion bigger than my entire hand in the produce aisle and immediately snatched it up solely to weigh it and a guy across the aisle asked how much it weighed because he was curious as well and when i told him it was two pounds he excitedly was like “it’s like the biggest one i’ve ever seen..” humanity rocks moment. bonding with strangers over giant onion
thankfully i was bold enough to take that step.. had i not arrived he would have never known… always had to wonder.. exactly two pounds btw
(via ourfuturegardenplans)
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“ahh this baby sure looks big from our ultrasounds which are known to have a wide margin of error! better schedule that c section! especially since you’re a first time mom and I have a vacation planned around the 40-42 week mark when most first time moms naturally go into labor… well its your c section day at 37 weeks, nah the baby probably doesn’t need any more time in there to develop lol lets slice up your abdomen without thinking twice about it, going through the birth canal in order to establish his microbiome is really a hassle you know, besides as soon as he’s out we’re going to cut the cord immediately because its just not very important to us that he get his entire supply of blood and stem cells. I’m not sure what use a growing baby fresh into the world would have for those. what he REALLY needs is an injection which has a 15% rate of adverse reaction in adults ranging from eczema to febrile seizures to immune system disorders, maybe higher for a little 7 lb baby still getting half the dose a 170 lb adult would get lol idk it hasn’t been studied, funny since the manufacturer Merck has been sued like a lot over harmful medicines they’ve made ANYWAYS dont worry I’ll give ya a nice "information sheet” about it :) dont you dare ask for the package insert :) if you don’t let us inject your child with this we will intimidate and verbally abuse you at best or do it behind your back and call cps at worst :) so yea some kind of “natural birthing and postpartum bonding process” is pretty interrupted here i guess but that doesn’t matter because you are a machine and i’m the mechanic, not a human woman lol. we’re not like every other mammal on the planet. oh breastfeeding isn’t coming along so well? you and your baby are stressed from all the physical and hormonal trauma you’ve just endured? lets get him on some FORMULA. also you’ve failed as a mother nbd. since you’ve just had your uterus cut open its real important you don’t get pregnant again any time in the next year, and well yes exclusive breastfeeding delays fertility in most women until weaning (biologically normal age for that is 1-3 years) but we’ve got your baby on that fortified soy..stuff instead so we better get YOU on some hormonal birth control :) this wont have any negative impact on your health or future fertility.. oh btw all future births within this system will be a c section, we dont do vbacs here and also there is a limited number of times your body can be cut open and heal fully and still grow a baby so..hope you didnt want like 4 kids or something lol. yea insurance will cover all this probably, and thank goodness cause you’ll definitely be back! aren’t you grateful for modern medicine??“
Never be afraid to get a second opinion! Ask questions! Seek alternatives!
(via dipsybelle)
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4chan is bad but they got some pretty funny memes sometimes
of course i can’t post this without posting the rest of the collection
(via smol-fangirl-bean)
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american explaining the concept of something overhyped: okay, so
(via supreme-leader-stoat)
